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There Must Be Something I've Lost

from The Game of Monogamy by Tim Kasher

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lyrics

I've become obsessed with my high school yearbook.
Teenagers peering with wondrous eyes
through the lens at what they'll become,
their unfulfilled lives
of marriages, mortgages - oh,
maybe I'm becoming too marginalized.

When I was young I believed in love,
but hey - I also believed in god - I know,
I know, I know, I know…
I want to believe I love you again;
I'll believe in a suburban heaven -
blissfully ignorant - I know, I know,
it's not so bad.
I should just settle down
and settle down.

I want to have sex with all my old girlfriends again.
I swear, it's just the familiarity I miss...
aw, fuck it - it's just typical male conquest.
You know, the world don't revolve around
your prick. Just ask your old girlfriends.

We were so earnest we were damned.
If we could just have one more chance -
I know, I know, I know, I know,
we've all got lives of our own;
cats and kids and husbands and homes.
So, won't you please let go?
I know, I know… I know I should
but I know I won't.

Those drunken nights passed out on the laptop
looking up old acquaintances.
There must be something I've lost,
something I forgot that keeps me
digging up these corpses.
Some mid-life death wish.

Won't you leave those poor girls alone?
They don't need you anymore -
I know, I know, I know, I know...
But still… I wonder if they ever feel
empty? Like something is missing…
They don't! They don't! They don't! They don't!
They don't! They don't!

credits

from The Game of Monogamy, released October 5, 2010

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Tim Kasher Los Angeles, California

Cursive / The Good Life / Me. Fourth solo album, Middling Age, out in April 2022 on 15 Passenger Records!

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